A Progressive Tournament Moment with Minto…

Michael Yamamoto’s Progressive Tournament is only 5 days away and, much like what Yak does for a living, there’s a lot of confusion about what a Progressive Tournament actually is.

Several members have asked questions about the Progressive Tournament so I thought I’d send out a FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions), tournament sheet.

1. Why is the tournament called Progressive?

In this context the word “progressive” is an adjective and as such, is defined as; happening or developing gradually or in stage; proceeding step by step.

For example, when I am at a bar with Beggsy and Dunsire, I progressively realize that it’s been 4 hours since I said, “Guys, I can only stay for one beer.”

2. What tees are we playing from?

We all start play from the white tees. However, after each hole you move back when you make a net-birdie and move forward when you make a net-bogey. If you make a net-par you stay on the same tee box.

3. What handicap index do we use for this tournament?

Use your handicap index from the white tees.

4. Do I have to give Angelo a cigar every time he asks?

Sadly yes. At his age it’s too tough to train him to buy his own cigars.

5. What if I accidently hit my tee-shot from the wrong tee box?

One-stroke penalty and you have to buy a round of drinks for your foursome.

6. Should we clap and cheer if Minto finishes in the money?

Yes, by all means clap! We have treated Minto unfairly for many years and it’s time to show our appreciation for his leadership, good looks, sense of humor, fair play and humility.

7. How will the winners be decided?

We will have payout prizes for 1st, 2nd and 3rd place low-net and low-gross. We will also have payout KP’s for every hole.

8. If Steve Rice Jones wants to bet Minto $20, how many strokes should he give Minto in the progressive tournament format?

Good question – Steve is a 2-cap and Minto is an 8-cap. 8-2=6. But, Minto will accept 5 strokes so it’s like Minto generously giving Steve 1 stroke. If you are confused, please see “Q&A” for question 6.

9. Since there are KP’s, do we all tee-off on par 3s at the same tees?

No, you must tee-off from your progressive tee-box position.

10. Does Ralph really determine if foreign neurosurgeons working and living in Canada qualify for a mortgage?

I contacted the Neurosurgeon Association of Canada and confirmed that many of Canada’s top foreign medical specialists have successfully secured mortgages without Ralph’s assistance by simply relying on their half million dollar annual salary.

5 Replies to “A Progressive Tournament Moment with Minto…”

  1. after wading through the gibberish my take is if Steve gets an additional stroke from Minto i am happy to take 1 also and help celebrate Minto’s fair play and humility

    1. Hey Ron, Didn’t you start every high-school book report with, “After wading through the gibberish my take on this book is…..”

  2. deflection Meaning in the Cambridge English Dictionary
    deflection definition: a change of direction, or the act of preventing something being directed at you: .

  3. Just so the master of deflection doesn’t get things going in the wrong direction, a new poll question has been added to the home page. Please wade in with your feelings. Also, a meme of Gordy Lee putting one handed while asking a playing partner what handicap they are masquerading as currently in the works….

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